Giving and Receiving

Not sure if it’s good or bad, right or wrong, but I’d rather give than receive. I’d rather help than be helped. I would rather serve than be served. When looking at any of the occasions I’ve been able to serve, it’s more comfortable to serve than to be served. I usually enjoy helping and have the hardest of times being helped. I’m sure some highly educated individual knows the technical name, I’m only able to describe what it is.

After doing a quick search, there’s an abundance of terms. From Dependent Personality Disorder to self esteem issues, all the way to good old fashion fear of rejection. I probably fall into several of those categories. I know that for me and why I’m on the planet, I was put here to serve my fellows.

I had a situation occur several years ago and I shared my perspective. A friend of mine said that’s great. Maybe the people you should be asking are here to serve too. Maybe you’re not helping them fulfill their purpose. My they have an abundance of resources from financial to experience, to freedom of time, and my unwillingness to ask them for help stops or hinders them from fulfilling their purpose. I was grateful then and now as I think of that perspective.

Typically we all see things through our lens. We see it the way we see it, from our perspective, and without the lens of another showing a new angle of the same thing, we may very well miss a magnificent lesson. After my buddy shared that insight, I didn’t have a problem with asking for assistance. Interestingly enough, I only had one or two occasions to ask over the years since.

I believe it’s important to be self-sustaining. I believe there are immense benefits to being able to fend for yourself. I have reaped those rewards. There are those individuals that will never have to fend for themselves. They may have the benefits of money coming in through an inheritance or something and don’t have to face the daily challenges most face. They may also suffer from some of those unknown terms I had to search for earlier.

I know that today, during this iteration of me, I need to grow and develop. I need to become adept at receiving. I am uncertain why, but I believe that to be true. It may be karma and me receiving what I’ve put out over the years. It may be a lesson in being confident enough to share what I’m doing thereby making myself accountable to others. It may be from the mere act of asking I can experience and that’s the lesson. I’m uncertain of how I’ll benefit from this lesson. I don’t really care either. Most lessons in life, I only get the benefits and values from, after I’ve done the work. I’ve rarely, if ever, have gotten the lesson while sitting in the classroom, it’s usually when the lesson is completed.